Home

*Disclosure: this isn’t my home, but goodness. What a sight I was able to capture.*

Since January 2021, I have been working and applying and attempting to find a place to call home for myself and my children.

A place just for the three of us.

I listed out the amenities and items that were important to me when choosing a home. Being a single mother and limited on resources and little to no support, I knew I would have to make some adjustments and sacrifices, but I had a couple of non-negotiables.

One: A place close enough to the community we are currently in so that my oldest wouldn’t have to move schools, again. Unless a major life change happens for us, I am staying put for now. I want to her and my son to continue to have community and build their relationships here where we are.

Two: Washer and dryer in the unit or even hookups! The fact that this is considered a luxury in apartments is hysterical, as I recently learned that in other states, it is STANDARD! California…..are you serious?

Three: A patio. Doesn’t need to be huge. But I desire an outdoor space where my people and I can gather together and connect, or heck give me some solitude to write. I live for outdoor spaces. I think I have a gazillion pins on my Pinterest board for outdoor living space ideas. Oh well.

It has been incredibly challenging so far in the hunt for the perfect space. Really, my prayer is to create something brand new for myself and my children. Our lives have gone through so much change these last three years and I am ready, well, long since ready to breathe new life into us.

And really, that is my biggest requirement when it comes to a new home.

A space to create new memories.

To live brand new.

I turn 40 in a couple of weeks and clearly the theme for this birthday is “Forty & Free.”

Free.

For the first time ever, everything will fall on me. I have never been on my own before. I got married at the age of 23. Had our first kid when I was 24. The second came along just before I turned 28.

I had lived at home with my parents until I got married. I went from one home taking care of me to now having and relying on my new husband to provide and care for me.

I claim independent woman quite a bit, but I have never truly been on my own. And now I am on the cusp of being on my own. No one will be able to save me. Whether or not I will be able to pay my bills and take care of the kids or meet their health and educational needs while they are in my care falls solely on me.

I rarely get scared, but this scares me.

I also know myself well enough to know that I have a bit of a bullish mindset and when I want something, nothing will deter me or stop me until I get it. Maybe that makes me a tad bit aggressive for some, but it is what has helped me achieve what I have achieved in the last 20 years of my life.

I am going to get a home.

I am going to create a life that I am excited by and proud of.

I will get to call it my own and love every second of it.

A dear friend of mine said her mission in life is to encourage women to love every minute of their life, no matter where they may find themselves.

Trenches of early parenting? Enjoy every bit because they fly so quickly. Build that home and create those memories. The time really does go quickly.

Single? Amazing. The freedom you have to live your life as you see fit and fulfill every passion and dream, even if you may be praying and desiring your person. Enjoy your life. Love your life.

For me, right now in this period that I am in, home means freedom. The breaking of the chains that have held me back and held me in. The rules and the limitations that were set on me (and I allowed them) because I didn’t fit the idea of someone else, I get to decide now to NOT wear those limitations and truly create my home and be ME. For the first time in a long time, I get to be me.

I am coming Home, finally, as me. Tiffany Rhea.

And darn it…… it feels so good.

I hope you are here too. If you are far from home….come back. Be You.

Welcome home,

Tiffany Rhea